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A Year With Jenn Wooten Online Live

September 09 2018
September 09 2018

As is true with most humans, my relationship with change has been a fickle one. My soul deeply craves change, but my mind and my body don’t always weather it well. As a student of Ayurveda, I’ve learned that my particular Vata constitution needs rhythm, routine and steadiness. As a mother of two, life with children has foisted the need for some semblance of constancy upon me in ways that have been mostly healing and sometimes maddening. How odd is it to both crave and reject the daily grind?

In several years of working with trauma, I’ve also learned that as human animals, we dance between our need for security and our need for novelty and growth. We see this in little growing humans. When they become mobile they satellite their parents in small orbits in order to engage with the world and then come back to home base to connect to what is safe and comfortable. When I think about this in evolutionary terms, of course this is how we are all wired. We all need an anchor, but part of survival and evolution for humans has long been leaving safety to explore the horizon beyond what is familiar and known. It’s true to say that the need to move outside of our comfort zones might be very well wired into our DNA?

2018 has been a season of change for me. It began with the unraveling of more than one long held and treasured relationships. These unravelings were anything but comfortable. They gutted me. And yet during these changes and all the psychic drama inherent in the ending of relationships there was a small clear voice saying “keep, going.” To be clear, it can feel impossible to listen to that voice when another voice above it is booming out “BUT WHERE? Keep going to where?! All I see is end of the path!” This is the myopia of the mind that paralyzes us from taking another step. And it is also sometimes advisable just to sit in the middle of the path, put your baggage down and wipe the sweat from your brow and the tears from your eyes.

And now I am presented with another opening in the path. In an unexpected, unplanned and initially unfortunate turn of events, my husband and I have seized an opportunity to fulfill a family dream of living abroad together.  I am reminded again that even when some changes appear unfortunate, I can hold the possibility that life just might be cleaning house for something new to emerge. There are still a dozen things left undone, most of it completely out of my control and no guarantee that I will make it on my preferred route to the envisioned place. And still I trust the journey. Through the humility and destruction of what was familiar to me. Through the limbo of uncertainty where it seems there is no way forward in the path. Through the unmistakable openings that present themselves with clarity and conviction. It is all essential learning. I have learned a deep trust that the evolution that what often feels like the end of life as we know can also be the evolution that brings us closer to the reality and the relationships that we long for. Closer to ourselves. Closer to the truth of life. These are the experiences that shake us awake. I am here for it.

I invite you to join me as I continue my journey into the unknown. Beginning October 7th, I will be leading a year-long online live yoga class every Sunday morning from 9am-10am CST.

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