Sufyan's Birth Story by Ravyn Abboushi
February 13, 2008

The decision to have a home birth was not easy for my husband and I at first. It came after much conversation and after changing care providers 4 times during the pregnancy. When I finally met our midwife, Heather Hilton, I knew immediately she would attend our birth and the fear and anxiety I was feeling about the pregnancy and birth lightened.

The day we began labor was Feb. 12, our due date. I had taken 2 long walks with my mother who had come to town to be present at the birth and to take care of us afterwards. That night she made us chili and we sat down to watch her favorite movie, "Sleepless in Seattle". There was no indication of labor being immanent. Then, somewhere around the scene where Meg Ryan is trying on her wedding dress, I felt tired and lay down on my couch. I was there for no more than 3 minutes when I got these 2 strange "popping" sensations in my abdomen directly above my navel. I had just enough time to say, "What was that?" before the first contraction came.
It was a strong contraction, even though it was just the beginning! I had taken 2 birthing classes and read dozens of books about labor and pregnancy. So I thought surely I would have a "ramp up" period where contractions began and then stalled out. My husband and I made plans to play cards and watch old movies, and take walks during this first stage of labor. We practiced positions to support labor and ease contractions. We made play lists on iTunes that would fit any mood I might be in during this time. But when my labor started, it was nothing like that. There was no "ramp up" time, no first stage to ease me into it. Just WHAM-you're in labor! It was 10:40 at night.

We called Heather. My contractions were 5 minutes apart and very strong, wrapping from my low back into my abdomen and thighs. By 11:pm my contractions were 3 minutes apart or less, and soon thereafter they seemed to be one on top of the other. And they were so incredibly strong that I kept thinking, "Wow. I am not prepared for this. What is making them so fast and intense?" I had time to do 1 yoga pose to ease my contractions a bit. I had time to say just one mantra before I slipped into "labor land" (the Ganapati mantra was what came to me). Then all I could do was stay on my hands and knees. No cool positions, no awesome partner yoga, no moving around and talking. These contractions totally owned me.

When Heather checked me at about midnight, I was only about 3cm dilated. By 3:am or so, I was 7cm. I tried to take a shower, but the heat made me nauseous. I got back on my hands and knees. I tried to get into our well planned and perfectly set up birthing tub. I got one foot in and got nauseous. Back on hands and knees. My husband was at my side, rubbing my back, holding me, bracing me when I pushed into him with each contraction, encouraging me. My mother was checking in with me, rubbing my hands, helping me when I wanted to move from one place to another. At some point a second midwife, Natalie Lake, came to help out. I remember occasionally finding her eyes as I went through contractions and seeing her smile back at me. It helped my confidence. And every time I doubted myself Heather was there to tell me I was ok and I was doing great.

As I labored, I was pretty quiet. Inside there were only a very few thoughts. I thought about my breath and how I would try to breathe through each contraction. I thought about using low noises to control my reaction to the intensity. I remembered this line from Khalil Gibran: "(Your children) come through you, but not from you." And I began to speak to Sufyan. I said, "You can come through me. I love you. I know it seems like it hurts me, but I want you to come down anyway." And that's what he did.

By 5:am I was pushing. And pushing was such a huge relief. I had crawled to my bedroom to deliver him. Suddenly I was lucid again. Things became very clear. The urge to push was undeniable. Leaning on the side of my bed, leaning on my husband and my mother, kneeling on a yoga mat and towels, I pushed for 20 minutes. Sufyan was born after just 5 ½ hours of labor.

My husband received Sufyan as he came out, and as soon as I heard him cough and sneeze it was like the intensity of the birth went away completely. I had so much energy, and here was my son! They gave him to me and helped us lean back onto pillows on my bed. He just stared up at me, quiet and beautiful! He was so beautiful. He stayed in this "quiet alert" state for hours afterward.

The midwives made an herbal sitz bath for us while Sufyan was weighed. He was 7lbs 3oz and 19" long. My favorite moment was when he and I sat in the bath together. His whole tiny body relaxed and his eyes got wide. I gently floated him in my arms and moved him side to side in the warm water and we were both soothed and happy. It was an amazing moment - the most beautiful moment in my whole life.

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Email Lisa Taggart at lisat@yogayoga.com